Week 1 review....

I lost 2 1/2 pounds.

Meh.

Not was I was hoping for.  I was hoping for that epic week one loss.  You know the one - the water weight one, lol.  Whatever it may be, it's a great motivator.  I see that big loss and it makes me want to keep it up, it tells me "You can do this, you rock", it makes me feel like the hard work is worth it.  

2 1/2 pounds doesn't quite do it for me.  

However, I will plug on.  I didn't do so hot over the weekend.  I had a piece of pizza Friday night- but declined cake.  Then I had a ball park hotdog and stole some of Ari's fries on Saturday- but passed on the donuts.  So I could have done worse, but I didn't do great.  I've been on track Sunday through today though.  2 workouts Monday, and a good workout this morning, with another one scheduled tomorrow morning.  Food has been boring but healthy.  Bought a few of those Dole salad kits and have been having them for lunch and dinner- adding some chicken or protein to them.  they are pretty good- packed full of greens, and easy to make with no kitchen.

In other news-  I love supporting mom shops.  Hard working moms finding time to create stuff at home and sell it to me.  I'd rather give them my money than Walmart, that's for sure.  

This week I received two orders from "mom shops".  I ordered 3 of these mugs for Lilah's teachers:

Today was her last day in the 2/3 year olds class.  Next week she moves up to the 3/4 year old class.  We absolutely LOVE the teachers she has had- so moving on is bittersweet.  Anyhow-  I got these mugs from BlumeCreations.  Shipping was super fast, and she was very pleasant to deal with.

My second order was something close to my heart.  If you know me well- you know my forearm tattoo has arrows that represent each of my children and is in reference to Psalm 127:3-5.  I happened to stumble across Aquiverfull on instagram and fell in love.  With her products, with her message, with her heart.  She also happened to be doing a big sale, which helped.  I order myself an arrow necklace, and the girls matching tops (I know, I know, I'm THAT mom #sideeye)

I made the necklace photo black and white as a courtesy- It's an impromptu "I need a picture of this necklace for this post, and I have no make up on, and probably am covered in baby spit".  Also- don't judge me by my eyebrows.  I promise to get them done tomorrow- scouts honor!

I can't wait to see the girls in their matching shirts.  Don't worry, you KNOW I will post pictures.

Latest on the house- it's been painted, yahoo!  And today I picked out our new floors.  I am excited to get new floors, but was kind of hoping they could match the existing so they didn't have to rip up the hallway and bathroom.

The left is before- right is now.  

And this is a sample of the floor I picked.

That's about it for news around here.  Wish me luck on Friday's weigh in.... 

Overcoming the voices in my head......

Not like the crazy ones.... I don't think anyway.  Just the ones that are there telling you you can't do things... making excuses....holding you back, you know the ones.  They are LOUD in my head lately.  
I need to get back into a healthy mindset- eating healthy, and working out.  But I have so many "excuses".  

I'm tired. SO. FREAKING. TIRED.   We brought Eleanor home on July 10th, and I haven't slept since.  That is an exaggeration.... somewhat.  I get bout 6 hours of constantly interrupted sleep a night. I'd like to think I could make up for it during the day while she naps... that's what everyone says to do ya know.  But those people must not have a 3 year old, and doctors appointments, and grocery shopping, and laundry.... 

So anyhow, that's excuse number 1:  I'm exhausted. She's worth it though....

Number 2: My house is still torn apart, and I have no kitchen.  This makes it VERY hard to eat healthy.  I can't cook anything, so I can't meal prep.  I do ok in the mornings, I have a protein shake or a "Kind" bar, through out the day I snack- which isn't the best.... "Kind" granola, lunchmeats, cheese... it's dinner that kills me.  We eat out almost every night and it's hard to stay on track doing that.  I could make BETTER choices though.  

Unfortunately I don't care for wine- if I did this would be a dinner I could do even with a wrecked Kitchen.

Number 3:  Fear.  It's hard to get out there and push yourself physically when every breath makes you wince in fear of ending up back in the hospital.  I'm scared.  But I can't control it.  If my lung is going to collapse again, it's going to do it whether I'm sitting on the couch, or out running a 5k, and that's what I need to keep in my head.  I can't let this disease control me.  I need to decide to rise above it, and do the things I CAN do for those that can't do them anymore.  I don't want to waste away another healthy moment because of fear.  Don't worry Mom, I won't go run any marathons or do anything stupid, but I will start working back into my regular routine.  I just want to feel healthy and strong again.

So, I've thought of all kinds of things I could try.  Weight loss clinics, cleanses, direct sale gimmicks, crash diets, etc etc etc.  I know they don't last though- and thankfully I'm cheap, and I don't want to blow a few hundred bucks on temporary results.  If it wasn't for that I'd probably be "cleansing" away right now!  So instead I joined The Biggest Loser on Facebook.  I won second place once back before I had Lilah, and I actually participated in a few rounds when I lost the majority of my weight before.  It's accountability if nothing else, its affordable, and I love a chance to win some money!  The competition starts tomorrow and goes for 7 weeks.  My goal is 20 pounds.  Normally I would aim for 1-1.5 pounds a week realistically, but since this is pregnancy weight I think I can lose it a little faster.

I'll check in weekly here with my progress.  I plan to go low carb (only 1-2 servings a day of whole food carbs-no refined stuff) that's always worked for me... with my PCOS causing insuin resistance if I look at sugar too long I gain 5 pounds. As far as exercise I'm going to do the Couch to 5k training, it's something I can realistically do without having to worry about daycare.  I can load the girls up in the stroller and go outside and get it done.  I'd also like to get back to a few classes a week at the gym, but those will just be bonuses if I can get a sitter here and there.  

Now, to eat all the foods before tomorrow........  

Home sweet Hotel.

I feel like a gypsy.  We left our house last Wednesday and stayed the night up in Shingletown, Thursday we checked into the a hotel here in town, Saturday we left for Fresno, and stayed in a hotel there Saturday night.  My dad was elected Commander of the Department of California for the American Legion.  We are all very proud of him, and know he is the perfect guy for the job!  Here we are at the Department convention in Fresno on Sunday-

We checked into a different hotel back in Woodland when we returned Sunday (the original hotel didn't have a pool!), then Monday night we had to move hotel rooms because the AC went out.  We are all settled in a new room now, with a bigger fridge... and Lilah is loving the pool.

It's been an adventure to say the least-  and I'm learning just how "minimalistically" (is that a word?  I don't care...) I can live.  I keep thinking of things I want to grab from the house- and then talking myself out of it.  

Trying to tell myself "it'll just be a few more days, you don't need it." 

 and "that's just more stuff to pack up when it's time to go home." 

Realistically though if I was able to go to the house I'd probably just go get all these things I think of!  I've been given strict orders to stay out though- and Andrew "lost" ( I'm thinking it was on purpose) my house key so I can't even sneak over there!

As of today they are still doing asbestos removal- it should be done today.  Then they need to retest and get clearance, then the water damage team can finish the dry out- THEN we can talk about reconstructing.  I feel like we have awhile still before we get to go home.  We were hoping to go home this weekend, but the asbestos team has taken longer than expected, and until at least the walls are rebuilt we need to stay in the hotel.  Missing walls in 110 degree weather isn't going to work for me.  

I am however, getting nervous about returning home the longer this takes!  I figured we'd be home days ago, and I could get everything unpacked and cleaned before Eleanor makes her arrival.  Now I am beginning to think I will be bringing Eleanor home to the Holiday Inn, and she will be there to help me unpack and clean once the time finally comes.  

Ok, let's get to the real stuff.  I've eaten like crap, and missed a few workouts.  I am tired, our schedules are a wreck, I can't cook, it's freaking hot, and I'm going to have this baby any day I think. There ya go, my list of excuses!  I'm TRYING to do my best- I've gotten Nugget's salad bar instead of McDonald's, I've had apples and whole wheat tortillas with PB for dinner instead of Taco Bell.... but I've also had shakes from Sonic, and M&Ms.  It's stress eating, it's comfort food, it's convenience, and maybe 5% pregnancy cravings.   I'm really trying to get my workouts in though.  I've made it to a few classes at the gym, went for a good walk with Marie in Shingletown, I even did Zumba twice... I hate Zumba- but it's what was available when I had the free time so I did it.  This morning I went and walked around target for about 40 minutes- got in 4000 steps!  Tonight I will go to Ultimate conditioning at the gym.  I went to it last night as well.  Monday I even got ALL green!  I was pretty proud of myself!  Almost did it yesterday, but I slept in so I didn't get my hourly activity at 7:00 am.

I need to start thinking about what I want to do after the baby is born  I want to do something new and fun, some sort of program that will give me motivation and accountability.  I know what I need to do, I know how to work out, I know what foods to eat, but I work harder for other people- instructors, coaches, etc- so I want a program.  Any suggestions??

Oh- Baby update.... I am 11 days from my due date.  I've had some contractiony type feelings but I think they are more braxton hicks that real contractions.  Having some mild back pain today, but that's really about it so far.  Check up Friday morning.

Ladies and Gentleman, Children of All ages....

Welcome to the best show in town.......

My house is officially a circus, and I don't even get to be the ringmaster.

I'm just shy of 38 weeks pregnant....last week I put the finishing touches on the girls' room, baby clothes washed, diapers stocked, bags packed.  My nesting continued to the rest of the house- wash the walls, steam clean all carpets, "Hunny how much work is it to replace the shower stall?" was even in there at some point. But on my terms.... my schedule... in my control.  If you know me, you know that's how I operate,  I have to have a plan, and I can't feel like things are out of my control.

Well, God's a funny guy when it comes to that. He only lets me get away with it for so long before reminding me that I am NOT always able to be in control.

Friday evening I noticed some small water spots on the kitchen floor- I assumed they were from the dogs bowl, or that Lilah had a leaky cup.  Then a short while later I saw more water.... what the heck.  Then I noticed as I walked my feet were getting wet, I looked down and pressed on the floor with my toes and watched as the water seeped up between the flooring.  Shit. Ari came home shortly after, we figured the ice maker was leaking, he pulled the fridge out, checked the hose, everything looked fine.  So he checked the other end under the sink- no problem there either, checked the drains for the washing machine on the other side of the wall- nope, not that.  So he decided he would call the warranty company.  We called them Saturday, they couldn't send anyone until Sunday.  So we waited around all day Sunday- the guy finally showed up around 7:30 at night.  he searched around just like Ari did, and didn't find anything.  Cut a hole in the wall to test inside there, still nothing, then they pulled the stove out, and right behind that and the cabinets was a steady stream of water coming from a cracked hose. Great.

So we've been without water to the kitchen since Sunday night.  Called our insurance Monday morning and filled them in- I figured they'd send someone out to give us an estimate, we'd replace some flooring, collect a check, and have a baby.  WRONG.   Obviously I've never done this before.  They send out Coit, a damage and restoration team, who took pictures, measurements, did leak tesst, moisture tests, asked a bunch of questions, yelled a lot in Russian, let the dog out, let the flies in, and barely spoke English.  They were here until 8:00 last night, and finally when they left, my floor was gone as well, the kitchen was barricaded off with plastic tarps, and 7 HOT and LOUD fans were placed to start the "Dry Out".

They informed me they would return Today, along with the Asbestos and Lead testing company- around 9:30 am.  

As we know I am trying to follow the Fit Girl 28 day program.  I had gotten some food prep done Monday morning before the chaos ensued, but not much.I got the lasagna done which is dinner days 1,3,5 and 7. It's supposed to be Pumpkin Lasagna Rolls, but that sounds weird to me... so it said you could sub other veggies- I chose zucchini and spinach instead.  Also since there's two of us I decided just to make a regular pan lasagna instead of rolls.  I took the recipe and multiplied everything by 8 to make 8 servings.

 Hopefully we can eat it tonight so I can report back on how it turned out.

 Unfortunately that was as far as I got, then I wasn't able to access the kitchen the rest of the day.  So I got up early today and figured I would make stuff ahead of time for the day and place it in the fridge in the garage so we could get to it as we needed it.  Well, I got as far as getting breakfast handled for everyone and the doorbell rang.  At 8:00 am.... surprise.... they were here early, and They got right to work so my plan was shot.  They needed access to the crawl space- which is in my room, in the closet- sure let me just clear my bazillion pairs of shoes, out of the way real quick.  Then the asbestos guys shows up, more questions, more access needs, then the manager from coit arrives... it's literally beginning to feel like LAX in my house at this point, people everywhere, hustling around, phones ringing, Russians yelling, the dogs running around crashing into things with her cone, Lilah is scared of the men in paper suits (they had to wear them to access the crawl space), it's literally a circus.  

Everyone finally cleared out around 12:00.  Gone for the day, hurray.  They left behind the HOT and LOUD dryers, and my kitchen is still closed off, but at least I have my bedroom back, and don't have 6 strangers in my house.  As of right now they are saying the wall between the kitchen and the garage needs to come down, and the cabinets need to come out, but they can't start any of that until the asbestos testing come's back.  So right now we wait.  I am rushing through laundry like a mad women since I won't be able to use my machines after tomorrow... I considered finishing my meal prep- but I won't be able to get to any of it so I don't know what good it will do.  I'm honestly at the point right now where I feel so overwhelmed that instead of doing something I'll just do nothing because I don't even know where to start.  I could pack the kitchen up- they didn't say to- but if they are taking cabinets out I imagine it needs to be done?  Should I let them do it, or should I?  Should I pack the fridge up and put everything in the one outside?  Or will they just move the whole fridge to the garage for me?  I should at least clean it out, half the food will be spoiled by the time I have my kitchen back. See what I mean- too much to think about.

So that's my reality right now.  So much for the 28 day meal plan..... looks like I'll have to give that another go once this is all done and over with.  In the meantime I am really going to try not to just say screw it and go back to eating crap- I am going to try and at least make good choices with whats available to me.  Like last night we had to go out to eat, and I had a large garden salad, I wanted a Burger and fries- comfort food- but I convinced myself to make a better decision.  I did make it to the gym last night in spite of everything else.  So at least there is that.  

Wish me luck as this continues to unfold.  Pray for my sanity please.....and the safety of these workers- it's a crap shoot whether or not I'm going to have a breakdown.

A big day of firsts!

My first day of Maternity leave.

Lilah's first day of preschool.

Lilah's first day of Ballet.

Annnnnnd the first day of the Fit Girl 28 day Jump start Meal plan!

I had these awesome dreams that I would get to sleep while I was on maternity leave... at least until the baby comes.  Wrong.  It's day one- Husband's alarm goes off at 5:00- I finally fall back asleep and it feels like seconds later I hear the dog prancing down the hallway.... not good- the dog should be gated in the kitchen.  Nope, she's escaped.  Its 6:00.  So I get up and get her- put her in her crate next to my bed... hoping for a little more sleep before my own 7:00 am alarm goes off.  Just as I close my eyes I hear the latch on her crate pop, she has freed herself again.  I gave up at this point.  Maybe tomorrow will be better.

Lilah and I headed out to school this morning bright and early to ensure we'd have time for her Birthday drink at Dutch Bros!  Made her day, she was so excited to tell them that she is now 3!  Then we headed off to the Y.  I thought I was doing ok- we went and met one of her teachers and saw her classroom-  it was outside time so I asked her is she was ready to go play on the playground- she was a bit clingy, but decided she would go with Miss Lindsay and check it out.  I watched her explore- with a tight handed grip on Miss Lindsay- for a few minutes, and decided she was going to be fine and I could go.  I told her I was leaving, and thankfully she ran over and asked for hugs and kisses first (she does love me!)  then went right back to the play ground.  I was holding it together quite nicely as I walked away, proud of myself for being strong,... as I walked through the gate they called all the kids to the flag, so I thought I would stop and watch.  When I saw her lined up there like  big girl with her class, the dam broke and the tears started flowing.  THEN they called her up to sing happy birthday to her.  She was so nervous, it broke my heart, I wanted to go up there and get her- but I refrained and instead I just stood back there and cried for her.  My sweet, beautiful, sassy, funny, determined little baby- is growing into a big girl.  I love it, and hate it, all at the same time.

As they dismissed them back to the playground I snuck out, and cried most of the way to the gym.  I can't believe what an emotional basket case I was!  I suppose being 9 months pregnant doesn't help.

Once I pulled it together I hit the gym.  Normally I would go to UJam tonight, but we will be celebrating Miss Red this evening so I got it out of the way early.  I did three miles on the elliptical, 10 minutes of "sprints" on the treadmill (Sprints is a complete exaggeration.... I can barely jog without concern of peeing my pants- lets be real), then I did a quick shoulder set and called it quits. 

SO, lets talk about this Fit Girl meal plan, shall we?  I followed them on Instagram quite some time ago- their page is inspiring and the result are real physical, noticeable, results.  Katie decided to take the plunge and give the jump start plan a whirl-  I've been eating like C-R-A-P, so I decided I would join her! It's all real food, no gimmicks, no pills, no meal replacements.  It's about portion control and healthy choices.... DUH.  Right?  Really, it's obvious, it's common sense, so why is it so hard???  I KNOW how to do all this-  lately it's just be laziness!  I don't plan and I don't prep, so then I have all the excuses I need to eat whatever is convenient.   But anyway- back to the plan.....  

I am hoping to do better than this ^ ..... but I am no stranger to having good intentions and lacking follow through lately.

Week 1:  

Breakfast is Overnight oats- they list Cherry Pie, I don't like Cherries particularly so I did orange overnight oats, and a blueberry one.

Lunch is a "Power Bowl" - Brown rice, protein, veggies, black beans and hummus.  I don't like Hummus so I omitted that.  They also provide substitute meals- one being Pasta Primavera Bowl-  I will be alternating that through out the week simply because it sounded really good.

Dinner is Street tacos, and Pita pizza's , one every other night.

So yesterday, we prepped.  I say we because Kate is doing this with me, yay Kate!  I did my Grocery shopping as I said I would so we were ready to go last night, and get this done.  I won't lie- it was a lot of work- BUT it's worth it.  And it's done.

Overnight oats- Oatmeal, Greek yogurt ( I use Dannon Light and Fit Greek), fruit, and almond milk.

All the makings of the power bowls and the primavera bowl. Rice, pasta, veggies, chicken, beans, salsa, marinara.

Completed Power Bowl-  mine have brown rice, chicken, black beans, roasted zucchini broccoli and asparagus.  Kate subbed carrots for asparagus in hers.

This is a primavera bowl - There is pasta under all those yummy veggies!  It's whole wheat rotini, marinara, mozzarella, zucchini, broccoli and asparagus.  I didn't cook enough chicken so we didn't add it to these bowls- we will have a hard boiled egg with lunch instead for our protein.

Yummy backyard fresh boiled eggs!

I also marinated the shrimp for tonight's street tacos, and chopped up some of the veggies for tomorrow's pita pizzas!

Oh!  And Kate made these little delights- 

They are peanut butter, oats, dark chocolate, honey and vanilla extract.  They look and sound delicious, but I haven't tried one yet.

You also get a 200 calorie snack, a square of dark chocolate with lunch, and some fruit/salad with dinner.  I haven't hard my snack yet.... and I don't care for just a plain square od dark chocolate.  So i'll be honest, I may have a bite of birthday cake later.... maybe.  I also am adding a second 200 calorie snack to my plan since I am pregnant.

So there ya have it, that's the plan for this week.  Wish us luck!

While I may not have done well eating wise this weekend (Lets just say we had Vince's Saturday- and I may have eaten more than my fair share of Ben and Jerry's throughout the weekend - see Dad, I'm honest) I did kill it on my activity!

That's Saturday and Sunday- green club both days- and far beyond!  I love a good weekend warrior challenge it makes me work harder.

Tonight we have our first ballet class- not to worry you know I'll take a bazillion pictures and tell you all about it ;)

Planks and Sushi- balance people...it's about balance.

Well- the instructor from last night’s class must have read my blog and known I needed to bust out some planks.  We did 10 rounds of 30 second planks-  a few months ago that would have been “Easy Peasy” (as Lilah would say- that’s her new thing).  Last night though, it was rough!  Shaking, fingers digging into the mat, legs wobbling, sweat dripping, - rough.  And today my shoulders feel it!  Tonight I will stick to the challenge and do my Day 2: 20 second plank- I have a feeling I can rock that with no problem, lol!

So after the gym- 15 minutes of cardio on the elliptical, then class- I went home - and per usual, didn’t want to cook.  I had trail mix for dinner.  Fail.  Saturday is the day!  I will go to the farmer’s market and the grocery store, and there will be no more excuses.  Until then though, no promises.  Anyone have any favorite, healthy, no cook, dinner recipes? 

Tomorrow is my last day of work before maternity leave.  I am so excited.  I can’t wait to have a little time to catch up.  Catch up on sleep…. Catch up on laundry… Catch up on cleaning.  It’s been really hard getting up at 5:00 am and getting ready for work after a long night of waking up every 2 hours to pee, or just to lay there with my eyes open for 2 hours – because why not.  So it’ll be nice to have a little flexibility and sleep in a little when I have a rough night.  And my little bug starts preschool, and ballet, and swim lessons, and I get to be home to take her to all these things!  I am more excited than she is!  I don’t see a whole lot of resting in the next 4 weeks- but I do hope to be productive.  Luckily I’ve gotten most of the baby prep done- all that’s left really is washing and assembling the co sleeper in our room, and washing the infant carrier. So I’m ready for ya, Ellie- but no rush, I’ve got lots going on the next few weeks- LoL!

I think that’s all for today- pretty uneventful yesterday… and Tonight I’m having sushi for dinner and probably not making it to the gym… so don’t expect much from me until Sunday or Monday when I’ve redeemed myself and have good things to discuss ;)

Have some self control.... No really, please do.

I’m still here…. I’ve been quiet because it’s been busy around here.  We are in the last week of school for the year and I am on my last week of work before maternity leave- so things have been hectic! 

Saturday was a success!  I dropped my car of at Big O for my oil change- and went for a walk (with slight jogging spurts).  Decided to dust off my Couch to 5k app…. Started from the beginning- Week 1… it’s been a LONG time since Week 1 was the best I could do {sad face}.  But- I did it. 

After that it was all party mode.  It was SO. Damn. HOT.  Gross.  I am so sorry everyone, and thank you for bringing your littles anyway- Lilah had so so so much fun, so to me, it was worth all the sweat.  She told me on the way home “Mom, I had so much fun at my birthday”- music to my ears.

Sunday was a rest day- got my steps in though- running errands, shopping, chores, etc. 

Monday was UJam- have I mentioned yet that I love it?  I do.  It’s fun, and upbeat, and I can modify to make sure I’m no over doing it.  I did a quick mile on the Elliptical before class for a little extra.  Not sure what my calorie burn has been because my fitbit is hanging on by a thread, and my new one isn’t due to be here until Friday… How will I ever survive!?

Last night was Charlie’s class.  I took Andrew with me this week.  Thought it would be good for him since he does most of her walks at home.  He did really well with her!  And she actually did really well too- she doesn’t do so well for me- I’m sure it’s because I have ZERO patience and she can sense my fuming frustration!  Ha!

Tonight is that “strength training class that has no name” that I tried last week.  I am looking forward to it!  Hoping to get to the gym a little early and do some cardio before class.

Now- on the other side of things…. Nutrition.  Terrible.  Plain and simple!  LoL.  I had fast food again… ugh.  And Candy- I keep eating candy.  A piece here, and piece there, but it all adds up! I don't know why it's been so hard for me to use self control!  I've done it in the past like a champ, lately though- I can't find it anywhere! I’m hoping once I am on maternity leave I can curb the mindless snacking.  I honestly think I will be pretty busy and on the go so that should help.  And I never got to the grocery shopping last weekend- so my healthy options are very limited in the house right now… and have I mentioned how HOT it is, the last thing I want to do is cook dinner!!  It’s miserable.  My back hurts, my feet are swollen and it’s a bazillion degrees, who wants to stand in the kitchen like that and cook? I see lots of salads in our future.  So that is a goal for next week- clean up the eating.  I have to, you know what they say- you can’t out exercise a bad diet….

Gah- and the plank challenge- I keep forgetting!  I vow to start TONIGHT.  Anyone else?  I could use some accountability!