Week 1 review....

I lost 2 1/2 pounds.

Meh.

Not was I was hoping for.  I was hoping for that epic week one loss.  You know the one - the water weight one, lol.  Whatever it may be, it's a great motivator.  I see that big loss and it makes me want to keep it up, it tells me "You can do this, you rock", it makes me feel like the hard work is worth it.  

2 1/2 pounds doesn't quite do it for me.  

However, I will plug on.  I didn't do so hot over the weekend.  I had a piece of pizza Friday night- but declined cake.  Then I had a ball park hotdog and stole some of Ari's fries on Saturday- but passed on the donuts.  So I could have done worse, but I didn't do great.  I've been on track Sunday through today though.  2 workouts Monday, and a good workout this morning, with another one scheduled tomorrow morning.  Food has been boring but healthy.  Bought a few of those Dole salad kits and have been having them for lunch and dinner- adding some chicken or protein to them.  they are pretty good- packed full of greens, and easy to make with no kitchen.

In other news-  I love supporting mom shops.  Hard working moms finding time to create stuff at home and sell it to me.  I'd rather give them my money than Walmart, that's for sure.  

This week I received two orders from "mom shops".  I ordered 3 of these mugs for Lilah's teachers:

Today was her last day in the 2/3 year olds class.  Next week she moves up to the 3/4 year old class.  We absolutely LOVE the teachers she has had- so moving on is bittersweet.  Anyhow-  I got these mugs from BlumeCreations.  Shipping was super fast, and she was very pleasant to deal with.

My second order was something close to my heart.  If you know me well- you know my forearm tattoo has arrows that represent each of my children and is in reference to Psalm 127:3-5.  I happened to stumble across Aquiverfull on instagram and fell in love.  With her products, with her message, with her heart.  She also happened to be doing a big sale, which helped.  I order myself an arrow necklace, and the girls matching tops (I know, I know, I'm THAT mom #sideeye)

I made the necklace photo black and white as a courtesy- It's an impromptu "I need a picture of this necklace for this post, and I have no make up on, and probably am covered in baby spit".  Also- don't judge me by my eyebrows.  I promise to get them done tomorrow- scouts honor!

I can't wait to see the girls in their matching shirts.  Don't worry, you KNOW I will post pictures.

Latest on the house- it's been painted, yahoo!  And today I picked out our new floors.  I am excited to get new floors, but was kind of hoping they could match the existing so they didn't have to rip up the hallway and bathroom.

The left is before- right is now.  

And this is a sample of the floor I picked.

That's about it for news around here.  Wish me luck on Friday's weigh in.... 

Overcoming the voices in my head......

Not like the crazy ones.... I don't think anyway.  Just the ones that are there telling you you can't do things... making excuses....holding you back, you know the ones.  They are LOUD in my head lately.  
I need to get back into a healthy mindset- eating healthy, and working out.  But I have so many "excuses".  

I'm tired. SO. FREAKING. TIRED.   We brought Eleanor home on July 10th, and I haven't slept since.  That is an exaggeration.... somewhat.  I get bout 6 hours of constantly interrupted sleep a night. I'd like to think I could make up for it during the day while she naps... that's what everyone says to do ya know.  But those people must not have a 3 year old, and doctors appointments, and grocery shopping, and laundry.... 

So anyhow, that's excuse number 1:  I'm exhausted. She's worth it though....

Number 2: My house is still torn apart, and I have no kitchen.  This makes it VERY hard to eat healthy.  I can't cook anything, so I can't meal prep.  I do ok in the mornings, I have a protein shake or a "Kind" bar, through out the day I snack- which isn't the best.... "Kind" granola, lunchmeats, cheese... it's dinner that kills me.  We eat out almost every night and it's hard to stay on track doing that.  I could make BETTER choices though.  

Unfortunately I don't care for wine- if I did this would be a dinner I could do even with a wrecked Kitchen.

Number 3:  Fear.  It's hard to get out there and push yourself physically when every breath makes you wince in fear of ending up back in the hospital.  I'm scared.  But I can't control it.  If my lung is going to collapse again, it's going to do it whether I'm sitting on the couch, or out running a 5k, and that's what I need to keep in my head.  I can't let this disease control me.  I need to decide to rise above it, and do the things I CAN do for those that can't do them anymore.  I don't want to waste away another healthy moment because of fear.  Don't worry Mom, I won't go run any marathons or do anything stupid, but I will start working back into my regular routine.  I just want to feel healthy and strong again.

So, I've thought of all kinds of things I could try.  Weight loss clinics, cleanses, direct sale gimmicks, crash diets, etc etc etc.  I know they don't last though- and thankfully I'm cheap, and I don't want to blow a few hundred bucks on temporary results.  If it wasn't for that I'd probably be "cleansing" away right now!  So instead I joined The Biggest Loser on Facebook.  I won second place once back before I had Lilah, and I actually participated in a few rounds when I lost the majority of my weight before.  It's accountability if nothing else, its affordable, and I love a chance to win some money!  The competition starts tomorrow and goes for 7 weeks.  My goal is 20 pounds.  Normally I would aim for 1-1.5 pounds a week realistically, but since this is pregnancy weight I think I can lose it a little faster.

I'll check in weekly here with my progress.  I plan to go low carb (only 1-2 servings a day of whole food carbs-no refined stuff) that's always worked for me... with my PCOS causing insuin resistance if I look at sugar too long I gain 5 pounds. As far as exercise I'm going to do the Couch to 5k training, it's something I can realistically do without having to worry about daycare.  I can load the girls up in the stroller and go outside and get it done.  I'd also like to get back to a few classes a week at the gym, but those will just be bonuses if I can get a sitter here and there.  

Now, to eat all the foods before tomorrow........